Sometimes we seek therapy because we are trying to understand and manage hurts that have accumulated over the years or even recent hurts that feel powerful and pervasive.  Of course it’s also true that we may seek therapy for hurts we have caused others in the distant past, recent past, or in the present.  Whether we have been hurt, have...

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Life has its ups and downs.  It is part of the human experience to feel down sometimes, to have a lack of energy for daily life, and to feel sad for a while.  However, it is crucial to be able to distinguish between the emotional carousel of daily life and the experience of clinical depression.  Depression can involve feeling sadness...

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Perfectionist. High Achiever. Overly critical. Lofty expectations. Many of us resonate with these phrases, and maybe even had them placed on us by others or by ourselves. I am one of these people – I have always set extremely high expectations of myself, and struggled when not able to meet these standards. I remember times as a child that I...

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I love doing couples work.

I had not worked with couples before I started working at Live Oak.  Most graduate social work programs provide minimal training in this area, so my exposure was limited.   I had always been so interested in and focused upon doing psychotherapy individually that doing couples work barely registered on my radar.  And for whatever reason,

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We live in a time when traditional conceptions of masculinity are subject to critique and revision.  The legitimacy of the critique only makes the conflict more acute.  Here are some examples, based on men I know but presented as composites to preserve confidentiality.

A man is working in a field he enjoys—but his colleagues are in more responsible positions because...

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I am a therapist. I am white. I am a man. I am a little beyond middle aged. I am in a relationship. I am organized. I like the color blue.   I like plants.  I like dogs.  I like turning flea market finds into useful furniture. I have a bad back. I am Jewish. I am busy.

Knowing Without Telling

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Jordan was seeing me weekly for several years to help him manage his divorce, relationship with his children, and decisions about his career.  It became apparent after the first year of therapy that he had started to use alcohol to reduce his anxiety.  Slowly and steadily, his use of alcohol increased until he had reported several blackouts and came to...

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